What is the definition of the word no? Just in case we were unclear of the meaning I looked it up in the dictionary. According to dictionary.com the definition is:
plural noes, nos, verb
| 1. | (a negative used to express dissent, denial, or refusal, as in response to a question or request) |
I think that is a pretty clear definition. For many people, the word no has several alternate meanings. Here are a list of alternate meanings:
1. Ask again later.
2. Ask again later but this time whine a little.
3. Ask again louder.
4. Ask many, many, many times over and over again in rapid motion
5. Rearrange the words in the sentence to say the same thing you just said but in a different way
6. Wait a few days and the try #1 again
I’ll let you in on a little secret. Not taking no for an answer is one of my pet peeves. This may have developed during my years as a middle school teacher, which I am convinced has prepared me for motherhood. But I’m not really just referring to saying no to those you have authority over. I believe that as women, somewhere along the way, we learn that in order for us to be liked we need to make people happy. If people are happy then people will like us. If we say no, we will make someone unhappy, therefore insuring that they don’t like us. I realized a few years back that this thinking is all wrong. How many times have you found yourself on the phone with a telemarketer because you don’t want to hurt their feelings? Now, I’m not suggesting that you should be rude, but I am suggesting that you take control over what you do and don’t do. Here’s an example: The other day during Eli’s nap, a telemarketer called my house and asked me to take a 10-15 minutes survey. I politely told the caller that I was not interested in taking a 10-15 minute survey. The caller than proceded to ask again (twice) and then explain to me that 10-15 minutes wasn’t that long. Well apparently she thought I hadn’t been taught the concept of time. What I wanted to tell the caller was that in a day where I had already gotten ready for the day, vaccumed, emptied the dishwasher, ate breakfast, got my son up, changed him, fed him, played with my son, read books, sang the alphabet song, changed a very dirty diaper, did a load of laundry, mopped my kitchen floor, talked on the phone, and finally put my feet up for a few minutes(All before noon), that YES indeed 10-15 minutes, although not long to her, was very precious to me. The last thing that I wanted to do was talk to a stranger on the telephone. I politely declined at which point she now offered me money to take the survery. After that no she told me she’d call back at a better time. I explained that wouldn’t be necessary. I think she needs to go to dictionary.com. This exchange was taking up valuable resting time so in the end I had to hang up which has now made me the bad guy. Oh well, I’m ok with that. Like me, everyone has choices in how they spend their day and we need to concentrate on those things which are necessary and enhance our life. Don’t get me wrong, I still say yes to things that I want to say no to. I’ma work in progress. But somewhere out in telephone land there’s a telemarketer that thinks I’m not nice, but I’m ok with that.
03 September 2008, 7:49 am
I LOVE THIS!!! It’s so fun to read and of course you always have relevant and meaningful things to say. I love that about you!